David Dearth shows off the spoils of victory on our August 1994 cover—implicitly telling the world that being jacked and shredded can bring you a golden-haired trophy of the fairer sex. He has every right to be happy, of course, having gotten his mitts on the lovely Laurie Donnelly, but there’s something slightly evil about his grin that screams “…and now she’s mine, all mine!” This issue also includes the cover line, “Stuff a Wild Bikini with Sexy Muscles,” which we can only imagine is a recipe for some kind of mythical bikini- wearing turkey.

It’s-a Me, Franco!

Get your post-workout carbs, just like mama used to make. Franco Columbu, who hails from Sardinia, was a good sport for allowing this stereotype-filled piece.

All Thumbs

How awesome was the Weider System Video set? so awesome that Dorian Yates gave it four thumbs up! So there’s something you didn’t know about the champ.

Keep it Simple

This diet feature provided the acronym KissDA (Keep it super simple and Definitely Available). Yikes. Whoever wrote that probably shouldn’t dispense advice on simplicity.