Things are getting hot and heavy, clothes are being thrown around your bedroom and you’re thinking the next 45 minutes (okay 20) are going to go down like a sexy movie scene. Suddenly your girl seems to be pulling away and hesitating about having sex with you when she was so into it just a minute ago. Now you’re second-guessing yourself: Was she disappointed when I took my shirt off? Was it that stupid joke she fake-laughed at during dinner? Does she think I’m going to suck in bed? Or wait, do I need more deodorant and a breath mint?
While your girl might change her mind about having sex with you at any given moment, if the issue at hand is that you stink, you said the wrong dirty comment, or you’re guilty of any of these other awkward bedroom mistakes, prevention is key. We’re share what real women told us about the things men did in bed that killed the mood for them. Avoid these missteps and you can get back to having fun.
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You Keep Asking Her If She Likes What You’re Doing
“I can’t stand when a guy asks, ‘Does that feel good? Do you like that?’ If you can’t tell a girl is digging what you’re throwing down, there’s a far bigger problem here. Also, do you really want the honest answer?” – Brittany S.
“My biggest turn-off is when a man constantly asks if I ‘like it.’ If I didn’t like it, I probably wouldn’t be having sex with you and the more you ask, the less likely I will end up liking it.” – Diana C.
While it’s good to check in, excessive questions about your performance and constantly second-guessing yourself can be a huge turn-off.
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You’re Doing the Right Thing at the Wrong Time
“I hate when a guy tries to go down on me in the morning… before we’ve showered… after we had sex last night.” – Nickole M.
While the gesture is appreciated, trying to go downtown when she’s not feeling so fresh often makes a woman feel more self-conscious than sexy.
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You Let Loose a Bodily Function at the Worst Time
“While we know it’s not something you can always control, please, please try to keep from passing gas when a girl is going down on you. Not only is it smelly and gross, it’s also a turn-off. She won’t want to go down south again if she’s afraid it’s going to happen the next time.” – Carrie N.
We get it, it’s natural, but either try to hold it in when her face is that close to the epicenter or give her a polite heads up (no pun intended).
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You Think We’re Starring in Your Favorite Porn Scene
“Ugh, I am not into it when a guy tries to imitate something from porn. Just no. Why would I ever want your semen in my hair or anywhere on my face?” – Alexa P.
Some women will enjoy certain levels of kink, but you shouldn’t ever assume a woman is comfortable with everything you are without discussing it in advance.
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Srinrat Wuttichaikitcharoen / EyeEm / Getty
You Don’t Watch Where You’re Throwing That Thing
“When he takes off my underwear and drops it on his dirty floor. I know undressing each other is supposed to be a turn on, but I have to put those back on, buddy! I always just pray they don’t land face down.” – Athena P.
It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but if your home isn’t particularly hygenic, be thoughtful about where you put her things.
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WANDER WOMEN COLLECTIVE / Getty
You’re Talking Dirty to Me for the First Time
“Dirty talk is a turn-off for me, especially if I haven’t known you for that long. I don’t want to feel like I’m in a porno when we’re having sex. I want a gentleman.” – Mary L.
Some women love dirty talk, but if you’re with someone who doesn’t, it can be an awkward mood killer. Don’t dive into the dirty talk unless she requests it or you’ve been with each other long enough to feel out each other’s turn-ons.
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Fuse / Getty
You’re a Sloppy Kisser
“If a guy is a really bad kisser—too much tongue, sloppy, just doing weird snake-like things—the situation probably isn’t going to lead to sex because I’m thinking, ‘If he can’t do this right and has been working on this skill since he was a teen, what else is he going to get wrong when I take my clothes off?’” – Sarah K.
Less is usually more when it comes to kissing. Don’t dive in with your tongue, remember to swallow so you don’t start to drool, and feel out her cues—if she presses harder, respond in turn, if she pulls back, ease up.
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You Stink
“If a guy has stinky feet or any other bad odor it’s a total turn-off for me. I can’t get past it. The result is usually bad sex because I’m so sensitive to the smell.” – Elisa K.
“When my boyfriend smokes his E-cig in bed, that smell turns me off… especially when he smokes it in bed and then wants to have sex.” – Lisa R.
Scent is deeply linked to attraction, so stay on top of your hygeine. And if you’re going to smoke, pop a breath mint or brush your teeth before you try to seduce her.
