There’s certainly no shortage of variety when it comes to sexual preferences: kinky sex; sex in crazy, off-the-wall places; vanilla sex.

You’ve probably got some favorites. But have you ever wondered if your sexual habits are normal?

Researchers at the Indiana University School of Public Health-Bloomington and the Center for Sexual Health Promotion set out to identify the number of sexual behaviors men and women engage in, as well as their level of appeal, to see what’s most common.

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In the study, 2,021 men and women reported how often, and if they enjoyed three categories of sexual behaviors:

  1. Solo and partner activities (e.g., masturbation, vaginal sex, oral sex, wearing sexy lingerie)
  2. Behaviors involving sexual enhancement products and/or media (e.g., using sex toys, sharing nudes, watching porn)
  3. “Social” sexual behaviors (e.g., threesomes, group sex, sex parties) 
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More than 80% of men and women had masturbated, participated in vaginal intercourse, and gave or received oral sex. These behaviors were most common. Here’s how “normal” and appealing other behaviors are:

  • Wearing lingerie: 75% women, 26% men
  • Sending/receiving nudes and scandalous pics: 54% women, 65% men
  • Reading erotic stories: 57% of all participants
  • Public sex: about 43%
  • Role-playing: about 22%
  • Being tied up or tying up a partner: about 20%
  • Spanking: about 30%
  • Watching porn: 60% women, 82% men
  • Threesomes: 10% women, 18% men
  • Group sex, sex parties, BDSM parties: less than 8%

“Contrary to some stereotypes, the most appealing behaviors, even for men, are romantic and affectionate behaviors,” lead study author Debby Herbenick said in a press release. “These included kissing more often during sex, cuddling, saying sweet/romantic things during sex, making the room feel romantic in preparation for sex, and so on.”

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All in all, while men and women think certain sexual behaviors are appealing, few admit to actually participating in them.

“These data highlight opportunities for couples to talk more openly with one another about their sexual desires and interests,” said Herbenick. “Together they may find new ways of being romantic or sexual with one another, enhancing both their sexual satisfaction and relationship happiness.”

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