Five Women Who Are Off-Limits

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Best Friend's Girl

PROS

You’ve had the luxury of knowing each other over a long period of time, under a range of circumstances–and lighting

CONS

If you’re the reason for the breakup, you’ll definitely be one friend short, and maybe more if your other friends choose sides.

VERDICT

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Ex's Sister

PROS

She already knows your shortcomings–the ins and outs of your last relationship, and why it went south. And she’s with you anyway.

CONS

Holidays with her family will suck.

VERDICT

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Stripper

PROS

She has the best thong-and-stiletto collection you’ve ever seen.

CONS

She makes her living undressing for other men.

VERDICT

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Intern

PROS

Internships usually last six months.

CONS

Internships usually last six months.

VERDICT

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Desperate Housewife

PROS

She knows what she wants and she’ll tell you to your face–no games.

CONS

Aside from the husband, and the Sixth Commandment, nothing a little plastic surgery can’t fix.

VERDICT

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