We all love a solid cocktail from time-to-time, but even the best of men have moments where they drank too much and their penis just doesn’t want to do what it’s told. When drinking excessively, you may feel confident at the end of the night that things will go smooth when you take your girl home, but the man downstairs doesn’t quite feel the same way. 

We hit up Dr. Charley Ferrer, America’s BDSM Expert, to gain some advice on what happens when your penis becomes overloaded with too much alcohol, and what to do in such a pickle.

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A typical situation is where you end up having one, or six too many drinks at the bar and even though you may become more irresistible with some alcohol in you, your penis wont. Pre-sex boozing decreases blood flow to your penis which in-turn reduces your penis’s level of “excitement”. So, once you’re intoxicated, only time will sober the little man up.

According to Ferrer, “Though alcohol decreases inhibitions and makes you feel like you can take on the world, or in this case, any woman at a bar or at home, the truth is getting drunk will cause your package to go limp at the worst possible time. Alcohol is a depressive substance for the nervous system, which often causes impotency in men when drunk. You may ‘feel like performing,’ but Pepe will be down for the count.” 

Here are a few excuses a man can try to give when this problem arises. 

“I just want to cuddle with you tonight.”

“Woody’s on strike.”

“He’s feeling a little low.”