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Read articleWe’re putting an end to your most puzzling penis problems. OK, maybe we can’t end all your sexual problems, but at the very least we can explain why they might be happening and what you can do about them.
Read through our list of common conundrums—we guarantee you’ve experienced at least one, if not more—to keep you and your johnson happy and healthy.
And remember: If you have a serious health concern of any kind, see a doctor ASAP.
Remember this the next time you're getting freaky in the sheets.
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You throw back a few too many drinks, head back home to your girlfriend (or bring a girl back to your home), only to find you can’t get it up. You, sir, are experiencing one of the many drawbacks of liquor: The ever-so-aptly-named “whiskey dick.”
It’s not just whiskey, though: Alcohol, aside from acting like a poison when you consume too much of it, is a depressant. So while all those beers and shots might pump-up your desire to have sex, heavy drinking definitely limits your ability to do so. If this happens to you a lot, cut back.
And if you’re struggling to limit your binge drinking, consider this: Heavy drinking proportionately increases your risk of erectile dysfunction, according to research published in the Indian Journal of Psychiatry. Think of that tidbit the next time someone suggests a shotski. Think with both heads in this case—you should feel your constraint and good judgment kicking in.
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If you experience delayed ejaculation—meaning that at least half the time you have sex, you can go to town for 30 to 60 minutes and nothing happens, or you can’t ejaculate at all even though your erection is normal—it could be due to internal and external factors, the National Health Institute says.
Certain medications have sexual side effects, although switching to another drug might not be an option. If delayed ejaculation only happens in certain situations—for example, you can ejaculate while masturbating, but not during sex—it could have a physiological cause. Anxiety, stress, and depression can really be incapacitating in every facet of life, so talk to your doctor.
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Premature ejaculation is the most common ejaculation-related problem for men. While occasional episodes happen from time to time, they’re frustrating—for everyone involved.
But there are ways to delay the grand finale. You can always masturbate beforehand—yes, the tried-and-true high school trick works, but make sure you leave enough time before Round 2 begins so you don’t experience penis problem #2. You can also wear de-sensitizing condoms, or enlist stop-and-go techniques. If it’s a chronic problem, it may require treatment, so seek out a specialist.
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Ilka & Franz
When erect, it’s normal for your penis to have a slight bend because of your anatomy. (Just like your mother told you, no one’s perfect.) During an erection, blood vessels relax and open, allowing blood to rush into your arteries; the blood gets trapped from the pressure and forms your erection, according to the Cleveland Clinic. The direction your penis curves toward depends on the proportion of your crus (the portion of your penis under the skin), according to research from the Journal of Andrology. Men with a short crus and a longer exposed penis generally have an erection that points downward, and men with a longer crus will have an erection that points straight up or outward. Sometimes a penis can bend to the left or right, but this is all good and fine; it’s part of the “normal curve.”
If you have an extreme curve and painful erections, you could have Peyronie’s disease, but this typically occurs in men ages 40-60 and over. It’s not a fun picture: Plaque builds up in the penis and turns into hard scar tissue under the skin. Know that you up your risk for the condition if you have raditation treatment for prostate cancer, surgery, or have a penis injury during sex. (Yes, you can fracture your penis.) If you’re unsure of where your bend falls within the spectrum, consult a urologist.
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Ask yourself a few questions: Have you been particular lazy with your hygiene lately? Using any new soap? Having sex with a strange new woman? All of these things can be the cause of your red, sore, itchy penis.
Jock itch is a rash that appears around your groin, mostly caused by excess moisture from sweat, wearing tight underwear, skin rubbing, fungal infection, and bacterial overgrowth. Not pleasant, but not untreatable either. Fungal-related jock itch requires anti-fungal creams, but you can treat most irritation with proper hygiene like keeping the area clean and dry, using gentle soap, and taking the time to shower after the gym when you’re most vulnerable. Certain grooming products have strong fragrances and detergents that can irritate your skin, or even cause an allergic reaction. Opt for gentle soaps and skin products made for sensitive skin types. Your reaction can also be due to an allergy to thrush (yeast) you came in contact with from your partner’s vagina. Your penis will appear very red, swollen, and be intensely itchy shortly after intercourse, but this usually lasts about a day. Both you and your partner should be tested and treated.
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RapidEye
Okay, so discharge isn’t necessarily a “normal” occurrence in men, but don’t assume you automatically have an STI. It happens when there’s inflammation in your urethra (the tube where urine and ejaculate come out through), and the resulting condition is called urethritis, which can be caused by an array of viruses, bacteria, and yeast. Discharge can range from thin, watery, thick even viscous, and range in color from clear, to white, yellow to bloody. The main culprits aren’t pretty. Yes, STIs like chlamydia and gonorrhea can cause discharge, but so can ureaplasma and mycoplasma (bacterial infections). If you notice any discharge, get tested so you can follow a treatment plan.
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A failure to launch is embarrassing, yes, but not unavoidable. In fact, most men can reverse erectile dysfunction by focusing on changing lifestyle behaviors (none of which involve taking a pill), according to research from the University of Adelaide. You can experience ED if you’re vitamin D deficient, diabetic, severely stressed, not having frequent sex, or smoking too much. Talk to a medical professional if lifestyle changes still don’t make a difference; you might need medication or hormones.
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It’s easy to blow things out of proportion when you see or feel a bump. Very small, slightly raised bumps (that don’t hurt and aren’t discolored) can be hair follicles, sebaceous cysts, or a mild allergic reaction—all of which are harmless and non-contagious. But some STIs appear as bumps, too. Herpes can show up as a rash, or pimple-like bumps with no physical discomfort, as well as sores that itch and burn; likewise, HPV can cause genital warts that are raised or flat, and flesh-colored. If you’re worried, get checked out by a medical expert.
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If you’re not circumcised, you can run into a problem where your foreskin can’t be retracted from the head of your penis, according to the Mayo Clinic. It’s a condition called phimosis and it generally happens with tight foreskin, though it’s treatable and might involve the use of a steroid cream or removal of the foreskin (circumcision). If phimosis isn’t resolved, it can cause other complications—one of which is paraphimosis where the foreskin becomes trapped behind the head of the penis and can’t be returned to its normal position. You’ll need immediate medical attention as this can lead to amputation.
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There are a slew of reasons you could be experiencing fertility issues, according to the Mayo Clinic. Health and lifestyle are crucial; if you’re abusing alcohol and drugs, you’re overweight and severely stressed, the quality of your sperm, your testosterone and hormone levels, and erectile function all take a hit. Medical causes include infection, ejaculation issues, defects, hormone imbalances, certain medications, certain surgeries, and disease. Even the environment can reduce the production, quality, and function of your sperm. Exposure to heavy metals, industrial chemicals, and heat (saunas and hot tubs) can impair your sexual health.
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