What if I told you that a quarter of everything your girlfriend said to you was a straight up lie? You’d probably call my bluff—and you’d be right. But not because I’m exaggerating. That number is actually worse—at least according to Texas A&M University research. In their study, researchers found that dating couples lie to each other about 33 percent of the time.

There is a bit of good news, though. Researchers found that most lies were of the white variety: People lied about emotions, opinions, personal accomplishments, and other things that are relatively harmless. Still, it’s unnerving how much finger crossing is going on!

Of course both parties—men and women—can be guilty, but here we’re focusing on the ladies. Women are dishonest for a number of reasons, says Susan Shapiro Barash, author of Little White Lies, Deep Dark Secrets: The Truth About Why Women Lie. “They may lie to placate or protect their partner, or to make themselves appear in a better light.” Dr. Kat Van Kirk, Ph.D., a clinical sexologist and marriage therapist agrees, adding, “Women will often say that they lie because they don’t want to hurt their partner. However, when it comes to ‘white lies’ I find that women often lie to protect themselves from their partner’s potential negative reaction.”

But even if your boo’s dishonesty isn’t always malicious, no one wants to date a Pinocchio. So how can you tell if your S.O. is being straight with you? Listen for these common phrases—and use our expert tips to get her to fess up to the truth.

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