Close Ad ×

Muscle & Fitness logo Muscle & Fitness

  • Workouts

    Workouts

    • Workout Routines
    • Workout Tips
    • Fitness
    • Athlete/Celebrity Workouts
    • Exercise Videos
    Find Exercises Targeting…
    • Abs and Core Exercises
    • Arm Exercises
    • Back Exercises
    • Chest Exercises
    • Leg Exercises
    • Shoulder Exercises
  • Nutrition

    Nutrition

    • Healthy Eating
    • Lose Fat
    • Gain Mass
    • Supplements
    • Performance Nutrition
    6 Milk Substitutes and How They Actually Work
    Healthy Eating

    5 Things You Need to Know about Plant-Based Milks

    Group-Of-Guys-Cheering-Bottles-of-Beer
    Healthy Eating

    Research Suggests that Beer May Boost Gut Health

    Group-Toasting-beer
    Healthy Eating

    10 Non-Alcoholic and Low ABV Beers that Are Fit for Your Gym Goals

    Wheat-Germ-Field-Farmer-Hands
    Healthy Eating

    5 Plant-Based Proteins You Should Try Adding to Your Diet

  • Athletes & Celebrities

    Athletes & Celebrities

    • News
    • Interviews
    • Women
    • Pro Tips
    • Behind-the-Scenes
    • Videos
    Norman Powell on the basketball court wearing his Clipper jersey
    Interviews

    Norman Powell 'Understands the Grind' for Maintaining NBA Longevity

    IMPACT’s Brian Myers pointing at you
    Pro Tips

    An IMPACT Star's 5-Step Plan for Creating the Perfect Pro wrestler

    Flying Knee Kick
    Pro Tips

    Try Kickboxing for an Added Jolt to your Wellness Routine

    Boxing fighter Richardson Hitchins landing a punch on his opponent
    Interviews

    Boxing’s Richardson Hitchins Explains the Importance of Interval Trainin...

  • Features

    Features

    • From our Partners
    • Active Lifestyle
    • M&F: Fit to Serve
    • Gear
    • News
    • Opinion
    Lyvecap image1
    From our Partners

    Revolutionizing Performance and Recovery with LYVECAP Probiotics

    INNO FAST 4
    From our Partners

    Transform Your Health with Inno Supps Inno Fast: Unlock the Benefits of ...

    INNO FAST 5
    From our Partners

    5 Reasons for Your Unexplained Weight Gain and How to Combat it With Int...

    Julian Edelman sitting on a bench at the south street seaport
    Gear

    Julian Edelman Has His Gear Bag Packed for the Broadcast Booth

  • Anti-Aging

    Anti-Aging

    • Functional Medicine
    • Hormone Optimization
    • Recovery
    • Wellness
    best spermidine supplement
    Anti-Aging

    Best Spermidine Supplements: Review of the Top 5 Brands

    Male-Elderly-Old-Bench-Press
    Functional Medicine

    Muscle Mass May be Your key to Defeating Injuries and Illness

    Old people enjoying life Sponsored
    Anti-Aging

    Best NMN Supplement: Top 5 NMN Brands In 2023

    AdobeStock_227446917 - 1109x614 pix
    Anti-Aging

    Best Resveratrol Supplement: Review of the top 5 brands in 2023

  • Flex

    Flex

    • Olympia Coverage
    • Athletes
    • Nutrition
    • Training
    • Videos
    Week in Bodybuilding 9:25
    News

    Get Caught Up on All the Big Shows in Bodybuilding

    Bailey’s Entertainment Model Search
    News

    Bailey’s Entertainment Model Search May Be Looking for You

    2023 Armlifting USA World Championships
    News

    2023 Armlifting USA World Championships to be Held at 2023 Olympia Weeke...

    Cathy LeFrancois1-Dobbins
    Flexonline

    Cathy Lefrancois Will Go Down As One the Most Beautiful Female Bodybuild...

  • Hers

    Hers

    • Workouts
    • Nutrition
    • Supplements
    • Athletes & Celebrities
    • Features
    Natalie Burn looking in the mirror
    Hers Workouts

    Try Natalie Burn’s “Killer” Core and Kickboxing Workout

    Trish Marmo
    Hers Athletes & Celebrities

    How Ballroom Dancing Helped This Athlete Regain Her Edge

    Mila Stanzani competing in ninja warrior competition after preparing with her ninja warrior workout routine
    Hers Workouts

    This 'Ninja'-Inspired Workout Will Help Strengthen Your Pullups

    Tiffany Lee Gaston
    Hers Athletes & Celebrities

    Getting Sober Helped this Fitness Star Break Through Her PTSD

  • Muscle&Fitness+

    Muscle&Fitness+

  • Olympia

    Olympia

    • Olympia Coverage
    • Buy Tickets
    Caesar Bacarella performing a dumbbell workout with biceps curls
    Pro Tips

    Caesar Bacarella Is Building a Fitness Empire at Full Speed

    Olympia-2019-Whiteny-Jones-Press-Conference
    Interviews

    Whitney Jones Can Break, But Can Never Be Broken

    IFBB Wellness Pro Yarishna Ayala
    Interviews

    Yarishna Ayala Shares Advice for Future Wellness Division Competitors

    2021 Mr. Olympia Top 3 winners Brandon Curry, Big Ramy, Hadi Choopin
    News

    BIG RAMY WINS THE 2021 OLYMPIA!

Subscribe to YouTube Subscribe to the Newsletter Terms of Use Privacy Policy Cookie Policy Accessibility Statement Do Not Sell
  • Workouts
    • Workout Routines
    • Workout Tips
    • Fitness
    • Athlete/Celebrity Workouts
    • Exercise Videos
  • Nutrition
    • Healthy Eating
    • Lose Fat
    • Gain Mass
    • Supplements
    • Performance Nutrition
  • Athletes & Celebrities
    • News
    • Interviews
    • Women
    • Pro Tips
    • Behind-the-Scenes
    • Videos
  • Features
    • From our Partners
    • Active Lifestyle
    • M&F: Fit to Serve
    • Gear
    • News
    • Opinion
  • Anti-Aging
    • Functional Medicine
    • Hormone Optimization
    • Recovery
    • Wellness
  • Flex
    • Olympia Coverage
    • Athletes
    • Nutrition
    • Training
    • Videos
  • Hers
    • Workouts
    • Nutrition
    • Supplements
    • Athletes & Celebrities
    • Features
  • Muscle&Fitness+
  • Olympia
    • Olympia Coverage
    • Buy Tickets
  • Resources & Highlights
    • Topics
    • Videos
    • Podcasts
    • Contact
    • Terms of Use
    • Privacy Policy
    • Cookie Policy
    • Accessibility Statement
    • Do Not Sell

Stay Connected

Newsletter Signup

Stay up to date

Sign up below to receive our newest workout routines, recipes, news stories, and offers from our partners

Facebook Twitter Youtube Pinterest
Open menu button
Open search bar button
×

Search M&F

Featured Articles
Lean Muscle
Healthy Eating

28-Days-to-Lean Meal Plan

With the right plan and the right discipline, you can get seriously shredded in just 28 days.

Read article
Kate Upton Attends the 2016 Vanity Fair Oscar Party
Women

The 20 Hottest Female Celebrities

Talented stars, killer physiques.

Read article
Bench press record holder Bill Gillespie breaking the world record at age 62
Pro Tips

The 'Dos' and 'Don’ts' of Bill Gillespie’s Record-Breaking Bench Press

At age 62, "Big Bill" shares his wisdom to dominate one of the ultimate strength marks.

Read article
The 50 Best Female Fitness Influencers on Instagram
Girls

The 50 Best Fitness Influencers on Instagram

Follow these fit women we're crushing on for inspiration, workout ideas, and motivation.

Read article
Sex

How to Keep Your Head in the Game for Better Sex

Keep the noises in your head from interfering with the noises in your bed.

by M&F Editors
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
How to Keep Your Head in the Game for Better Sex
View Gallery

How to Keep Your Head in the Game for Better Sex

Close gallery popup button
1 OF 6

1 of 6

Hot chick massaging guy

“Everything is about sex—except sex.” Oscar Wilde nailed it, literally (the man’s inability to keep it in his pants got him thrown in jail). You may be smarter than that, but don’t get cocky: Everything we do as men, even when we don’t realize it, is part of a primal, subconscious ploy to get some.Chasing skirts (or loincloths) has been in our DNA since before men started reasoning with the fairer sex and would instead just club them over the head. The cruel irony these days, of course, is that when you do finally convince a woman to come back to your man cave, you are so preoccupied—a looming deadline, the money you still owe for that bet you don’t even remember making—that it’s increasingly difficult to focus on the task at hand, assuming your stressed-out anatomy lets you get that far.Relax. You’re not broken. “It’s normal to feel pressure about sex as a guy,” says dating expert and author Amber Madison. “You have a lot on your plate. You have a lot of responsibilities.” Working hard, however, shouldn’t prevent you from playing hard. Luckily, freeing yourself from bedroom A.D.D. is easy. 5 Simple Tips to Better Sex >>>

2 of 6

Guy turning off smartphone

Disconnect

Maybe you love your job, maybe you loathe it, but unless you’re in the same line of work as Dirk Diggler, it has no business in your sex life. Going dark for a few hours in the evening won’t get you fired, and it’s a great way to cut out distractions. “Think of sex as the one thing you’re going to do for yourself all day,” Madison says.

3 of 6

Guy kissing girls neck

Pregame

A Czech survey published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women’s ability to reach orgasm is more about the duration of intercourse than foreplay. (The ideal feature presentation runs 16.2 minutes.) Still, women stateside aren’t keen on skipping the previews. Take advantage of foreplay to heighten her arousal and help you get in the zone at the same time. “If you go straight from walking through the door to having sex, your mind doesn’t have a lot of time to adjust,” Madison says. “Spend 10 to 15 minutes kissing each other and teasing each other. That will help you get more focused on what you’re about to do.”

4 of 6

Couple in passionate embrace

Engage All Five Senses

When you pay attention to what’s going on around you (or under you), it’s hard for your brain to dwell on internal thoughts. “Thinking about what you’re doing is going to help you stay aroused and make sex more fun and more relaxing, instead of just another item on your to-do list,” says Madison, who offers up a simple yet effective method. “Ask yourself, ‘What am I hearing right now, what am I seeing, what am I feeling?’”

5 of 6

Man lingers over lover

Focus On Her

Think your slow start in bed makes you a unique (albeit melting) snowflake? Not so much. Chances are she’s going through something similar—you’re just too busy thinking about yourself to realize it. “I hear a lot of women say that sex can start to feel like a chore,” Madison says. “They say, ‘When we’re having sex I’m thinking about how many calories I ate that day or what my boss said at work.’ It’s the exact same thing where people are having sex but their mind is somewhere else.” Bring her attention back to the present, and yours will follow.10 Adventurous Sex Moves to Try Tonight>>>

6 of 6

Sex in the kitchen

Do It In The Kitchen

Your bedroom is a minefield of mojo-murdering visual cues. Things like your alarm clock, briefcase or laptop can remind you of a meeting or unsent e-mail, or, worse, a prior mattress malfunction. Luckily, a change of scenery may be all you need to get your head back in the game. “You hear about people who get off on having sex at the Mile-high Club,” Madison says. “I can’t think of a worse place to have sex than in an airplane bathroom. But what’s exciting about the prospect is that you’re not supposed to be having sex there. That’s why having sex in offices, in the kitchen, on the dining-room table—all of those types of locations—can be very exciting, because they’re not necessarily places you would normally have sex.”

Back to intro

“Everything is about sex—except sex.” Oscar Wilde nailed it, literally (the man’s inability to keep it in his pants got him thrown in jail). You may be smarter than that, but don’t get cocky: Everything we do as men, even when we don’t realize it, is part of a primal, subconscious ploy to get some.

Chasing skirts (or loincloths) has been in our DNA since before men started reasoning with the fairer sex and would instead just club them over the head. The cruel irony these days, of course, is that when you do finally convince a woman to come back to your man cave, you are so preoccupied—a looming deadline, the money you still owe for that bet you don’t even remember making—that it’s increasingly difficult to focus on the task at hand, assuming your stressed-out anatomy lets you get that far.

Relax. You’re not broken. “It’s normal to feel pressure about sex as a guy,” says dating expert and author Amber Madison. “You have a lot on your plate. You have a lot of responsibilities.” Working hard, however, shouldn’t prevent you from playing hard. Luckily, freeing yourself from bedroom A.D.D. is easy.

 

5 Simple Tips to Better Sex >>>

Disconnect

Maybe you love your job, maybe you loathe it, but unless you’re in the same line of work as Dirk Diggler, it has no business in your sex life. Going dark for a few hours in the evening won’t get you fired, and it’s a great way to cut out distractions. “Think of sex as the one thing you’re going to do for yourself all day,” Madison says.

Pregame

A Czech survey published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women’s ability to reach orgasm is more about the duration of intercourse than foreplay. (The ideal feature presentation runs 16.2 minutes.) Still, women stateside aren’t keen on skipping the previews. Take advantage of foreplay to heighten her arousal and help you get in the zone at the same time. “If you go straight from walking through the door to having sex, your mind doesn’t have a lot of time to adjust,” Madison says. “Spend 10 to 15 minutes kissing each other and teasing each other. That will help you get more focused on what you’re about to do.”

Engage All Five Senses

When you pay attention to what’s going on around you (or under you), it’s hard for your brain to dwell on internal thoughts. “Thinking about what you’re doing is going to help you stay aroused and make sex more fun and more relaxing, instead of just another item on your to-do list,” says Madison, who offers up a simple yet effective method. “Ask yourself, ‘What am I hearing right now, what am I seeing, what am I feeling?’”

Focus On Her

Think your slow start in bed makes you a unique (albeit melting) snowflake? Not so much. Chances are she’s going through something similar—you’re just too busy thinking about yourself to realize it. “I hear a lot of women say that sex can start to feel like a chore,” Madison says. “They say, ‘When we’re having sex I’m thinking about how many calories I ate that day or what my boss said at work.’ It’s the exact same thing where people are having sex but their mind is somewhere else.” Bring her attention back to the present, and yours will follow.

10 Adventurous Sex Moves to Try Tonight>>>

Do It In The Kitchen

Your bedroom is a minefield of mojo-murdering visual cues. Things like your alarm clock, briefcase or laptop can remind you of a meeting or unsent e-mail, or, worse, a prior mattress malfunction. Luckily, a change of scenery may be all you need to get your head back in the game. “You hear about people who get off on having sex at the Mile-high Club,” Madison says. “I can’t think of a worse place to have sex than in an airplane bathroom. But what’s exciting about the prospect is that you’re not supposed to be having sex there. That’s why having sex in offices, in the kitchen, on the dining-room table—all of those types of locations—can be very exciting, because they’re not necessarily places you would normally have sex.”

Topics:
  • Mental health
  • Relationships
  • Sex tips
Author picture
Written by M&F Editors
Also by M&F Editors
Female bodybuilder and Ms Olympia Lenda Murray wearing a black bikini
News

Lenda Murray Opens Up About The 1991 Ms. Olympia Controversy

Bodybuilder Cedric McMillan passes away
News

The Bodybuilding Community Pays Tribute to Cedric McMillan

Newsletter Signup

Stay up to date

Sign up below to receive our newest workout routines, recipes, news stories, and offers from our partners

Muscle & Fitness logo

Follow us

Facebook Twitter Youtube Pinterest

More news

Muscular-Man-Doing-Pushup-With-Sexy-Female-On-His-Back
Sex

6 Ways Working Out Improves Your Sex Life

Find out how hitting the gym can improve your sexual performance.

Read article
Researchers Find a Cure for a Man's Mysterious Orgasm Allergy
Sex

Man Suffered From Mysterious Orgasm Allergy

A cure for the condition has finally come up.

Read article
Young-Couple-In-Bed-Awkward
Sex

9 Foods That Can Kill Your Sex Drive

Rid your fridge of these items that's causing your low libido.

Read article
All Sex
  1. Home
  2. /
  3. Women
  4. /
  5. Sex
  6. /
  7. How to Keep Your Head in the Game for Better Sex
Muscle & Fitness logo
  • Workouts
  • Nutrition
  • Athletes & Celebrities
  • Features
  • Recipes
  • Topics
  • Videos
  • Exercise Videos
  • Podcasts
  • RSS Feed
  • Muscle&Fitness +
  • Buy Olympia Tickets
  • Archives
  • Sitemap
Facebook Twitter Youtube Pinterest

Newsletter Signup

Stay up to date

Sign up below to receive our newest workout routines, recipes, news stories, and offers from our partners

Muscleandfitness.com is part of a360media Fitness & Health Network

Contact Us Terms of Use Privacy Policy Cookie Policy Do Not Sell Accessibility Statement

JW Media, LLC

Copyright 2023 JW Media, LLC, parent company of Muscle & Fitness. All rights reserved.